I slept in today till about 10 or so, and then I was lying in bed half asleep, half deep in thought till 11am. It’s been a long week and it feels like it’s been ages since I was last able to sleep in, and the wake up half-asleep and just stare into the blankness of my ceiling. I was lost in thought. You ever have those moments? I do. Always. And I never remember them. What I do remember is waking up to “Blue” by Eiffel 65 and thinking, have you ever stopped to think about the lyrics in the songs you listen to every day?
“Yo listen up / Here’s a story about a little guy / That lives in the blue world / And all day and all night and every thing he sees / Is just blue like him / Inside and outside / Blue his house / With a blue little window / And a blue corvette / And everything is blue for him / And himself and everybody around / Cuz he ain’t got nobody to listen to / Blue are the words I say and what I think / Blue are the feelings that live inside me.” – “Blue” by Eiffel65
The message I make out of this song intrigues me. The song almost reflects this little blue guy who’s able to affect his environment because how he feels on the inside. Maybe I’m over-analyzing this whole song. But, when I heard this song, I felt somewhat energized. We can change the world around us…even if it’s to make it…blue. XD
Anyway. I miss having the long side of my bed up against the wall. I miss waking up cuddled against the wall, with the slightly opened window letting in the cool breeze and the warm California sun. But being able to be in a daze in bed for an hour, helped me recover from all these happy memories, helped me to not get sucked in them too deeply. I haven’t completely lost myself this past overwhelming tsunami of Castellano and Argentine culture.
So this is how I started my last day of week 1. Lazy Sunday. You know the song “Sunday Morning Call” by Oasis? It would completely describe how I feel about this past week: slightly out of place, but still okay. I’ve decided that my Sundays for the next 21 coming Sundays will be day of recuperation, reflection, and re-determination. Oh, and also, days to commit for SGI [Erika went to the kaikan today, and apparently they’re having an exhibition next weekend].
I’m completely over-analyzing my situation here in Buenos Aires. I met up with a couple of people for a homework assignment in our Castellano orientation and met Argentine college students, both studying abroad like me and locals. I was asked this: why Buenos Aires. The first answer that I thought was obvious was for studies. So, clearly, I came here solely for the film track, even with the possible 50% chance that I might not be able to take it because the credits may not be transferable.
But, that didn’t stop me.
It made me wonder, though. Outside of studies, what was my reason being here. Up until this past year as a sophomore, studies came secondary to everything else I did. Have I learned to be more conscious about my academics? But, still, I’m in a completely different country, and all I could answer was to study. Hypothetically, I could study film anywhere, and I just found the open opportunity here. I think it’s time for me to explore Argentina, to whole new level, as a porteña.
I almost had a good dialogue with a Brazilian who’s studying at UCA, but my inability to fully communicate orally completely drained it. We were first talking about the differences between cultures and how they’re perceived from outsiders. And then, pinpointed Japan and the U.S. in particular and asked me why she sees so many people of the Asian race only marry within their race, even when they live in a place like the U.S or Argentina. 1) I was completely stumped, and 2) when I tried to describe the cultural difference between the U.S. and Japan, she couldn’t understand.
But, it’s okay. I’m happy I understood what she said.
We were all sitting in one of the park lawns of the ferría I went to yesterday. I just love it there. I think that’ll be a place I go to every weekend to just chill and talk, while walking around the vendors’ stands, browsing around.
Anyway, we were there in the first place to take 10 pictures for our “scavenger hunt.” I think I took some good shots, some maybe questionable. It’s much easier to take pictures when you have sources that’ll work with you, the way you want it to. It was fun, even though it was FREEZING out. I think it hit about high 30s ish. I may be exaggerating, but it was so cold, I couldn’t feel my fingers or the camcorder in my hands.
Week 2 is starting… wow, already a week has past. I’ll step it up. Reach out to more people. Connect. Go out to some café and just lounge around. While talking to my mom [I called her today], I realized, I’m in a city that doesn’t sleep. I need to take advantage of that. When in Argentina, do as the Argentines do.
“And in your head do you feel / What you’re not supposed to feel / And you take what you want / But you won’t get hope for free / You need more time / Because your thoughts and words won’t last forever more / And I’m not sure if it’ll ever work out, right? / But it’s okay, it’s alright.” – “Sunday Morning Calls” by Oasis
End - Week 1: Settling In