Day 82: Letter to My Twin Soka Brothers and Sisters [3/5] / by Sarah Kakusho

Just when you think I've decided to update...here's just a filler. One day, I'll have the time and energy to focus on updating these; however, till that time comes, sorry! -_-;; Aaa...so many stories to tell, so little time to tell it in. On one final note, I've completed my 10-hour daimoku today! It was tough, it was brutal, but it was worth it. Need I say more? [I'll recount later...]

2008.10.10, 10-hour toso, 10am-10pm with breaks: accomplished. KYAA!
Kusho. Out.

[taken from Facebook] You know you´re living in Argentina when...

- Breakfast is crackers, lunch is ñoquis, milanesa, or empanadas, and dinner´s at 23:00.
- Most of the girls you know wear chupin pants, bright colored shirts, and converse shoes.
- Well, everyone wears converse shoes... from your host grandfather to the remisero to the lady checking you out at the super.
- You´ve gotten enganchado with a telenovela.
- You have a kiosko radar and can find candy, gaseosa (usually pomelo), y/o carne within a block of any location in your town.
- You automatically divide all prices by 3 or 4.
- When you see people walking around in labcoats you know they´re not scientists, but actually public school kids. But those preschool teacher dresses are just weird.
- You´ve had a near-death experience crossing the road.
- You know the location of all the heladerias in your town. And could give an educated lecture on the variety of flavors, and how they are responsible for all of those kiloooos!
- You can ride your bike to school, get icecream, buy meat, go to about 17 kioskos, and about 7 different chinese supers. And you ride your bike instead of taking a remis because 4 pesos is just way too much.
- Your rotary encourages you to take the micro to Buenos aires so they don´t have to drive you. Jejeee.
- Cumbia is in your bones. you just can´t get that ch chchch chchch beat out.
- You can go into whatever kiosko you want and buy a life´s supply of quilmes, gancia, and fernet. and you have :) it lasted one night with your crazy compañeros.
- When you ask an argentine ¿How are you? (en ingles) they say FINE every single time. Every. Single. Time. You never met such "fine" people in your life
- You have a street, plaza, and a club atletico named after San Martin. And at least one host brother or host cousin named Martin too.
- Your compañeros are Juan, Maria, Sofia, and Lucia.
- Mayonesa is more than a condiment.
- You have been known to say "MACdohnalds" and "shonny deep" in order to be understood.
- Yessica Yolanda lleva su malla amarilla a la playa. we speak prettier. and cordobeses sing!
- You´re an hincha of Boca or River
- football no longer makes you think of fat buys in masks. hockey doesn´t involve ice, and you´ve given up on trying to explain lacrosse.
- Your feet are always dirty. But a cleaning lady comes once a day?
- They´ve eaten all of your peanut butter, nutella, chocolate, skittles (es-qui-tles), and other delicacies from los eeuu.
- You used to be a vegetarian. Past tense.
- Eggs and carrots belong together. Tomatoes and Onions belong together. Lettuce belongs alone. They do NOT all belong together!
- You forgot your key and had to ring the doorbell at 7.30 am but it was okay because your host brother does it every sunday morning.
- You live a block from your host grandparents, 3 from your host cousins, and 10 from your crazy great aunt.
- You know at least 1 person who died in a cuatriciclo accident, moto, or micro, or auto. but SEATBELTS ARE FOR WIMPS!
- You cross your q´s.
- Ya fue....
- Floggers are silly. and they wear bright pants.
- You spell your name phonetically in your native language. Every person you know has a different nickname for you. Juan - Juanito, juancito, juany, juani, juanche and it goes onnn
- Los Simpsón are everyyywherreeeeee....... and obviously a completely 100% accurate portrayal of yanqui life!
- You see your 14 year old host brother in the boliche at 6 am.
- Your english classes teach only the most important phrases: NO WAYYY!!! HOLY SHIT!!!! WHAT UP, BITCHES?? WHAT´S COOKIN GOOD LOOKIN? (your alumnitos will do great in the english speaking world :) )
- Bithdays involve the entire town going to your garage and eating chips (not chips, sheeps) and pizzetas and tomando una cervecita a las 4 en la tarde.
- "8 a la tarde" doesn´t sound funny anymore.
- There are more people in the street at 4 am the 4 pm. te juro por dios.
- You´ve fallen in love with Buenos Aires. And with every argentine man you lay your eyes on... aren´t they just such bonbones?
- You learned to swear before you learned the present tense... q hdp!!!
- Dando vueltas is a great pasttime, especially with 12 people in the truckbed.
- You drink mate for breakfast, lunch, and merienda. For dinner you drink cerveza or vino. Or mate if you´re THAT addicted :)
- You beat them at truco because they thought you didn´t understand bajajaja.
- You use spanish words with your friends from home and they´ve just gotten used to it (q polmo! q pesado!)
- You took a math test and got an 8 without studying because you learned it in 8th grade. but you´d never tell them that....
- Your town has its own television station. You were on it and felt famous!
- "Che" has become part of your vocabulary. Pero mal, boludo, mal.
- No one else seems to realize how funny the gallegos talk.
- When they talk about Bush, you say you´re from Canada. Hee hee.
- You don´t have to dye your hair to be blonde!
- Yanqui isn´t an insult. But if you´re belgian and they call you verga... basta eh!
- "She plays very good," it says on the board. You say, sorry ma'am, but it´s "well" and she says, callate yanqui, we teach british english here. umm?
- "You´re protestant? DO YOU BELEIVE IN GOD?"
- When people ask you... so why did the american public pick bush to be the leader of the free world, you answer with HAVE YOU EVER MET 1 PERSON WHO VOTED FOR CRISTINA KIRCHNER? pwned.
- You´ve been begged to incite a movement in your home country to fight against britian for the MALVINAS because they´re OURS!
- You´re more argentine than the argentines because you learned how to dance tango.
- Pencils are for wimps, we use lapiceras and borra tinta, baby!
- You being to think in the metric system... and get questions like "How many kilometers is it from your state to Iowa?" (I did today at lunch. i said 1000? who knows hahaha)
- You have materias that are inexplicable in spanish or english or your language.. Planificiation? What?
- When you fall you say "oof" and when you´re confused you say "eh?"
- Everything is better with an alfajor.
- If you´re from any pcia except buenos aires, you hate porteños, If you´re from pcia bsas, you get offended when they call you a porteño. and if you´re a porteño, you don´t care what those paisanos think anyways. Do they even have electricity?
- Nacho is a nickname for Ignacio, not a spicy "mexican" food.
- In fact, just throw out any reference to Mexico you might have in your vocabulary. Their food is too spicy.
- You like to style your buso de egresados. or you will when it arrives 2 days before you leave for your home country. because in argentina 45 days means 67 days probably.
- Girls DO NOT PLAY FUTBOL.
- "Not" jokes just don´t translate. You tried.
- The day you met the argentine who appreciated your postal service and not just Avirl and Red Hot you got irrationally excited.
- Dulce and Salado must be kept far far apart.
- You can have a kickass day in buenos aires for 20 pesos. Less, if you don´t eat :)
- You got your legs waxed for $15 pesos. Wasn´t worth it.
- "YOU USE TAMPONS? THAT DE-VIRGINIZES YOU!!!"
- Stories start with "when the dollar was igual with the peso."
- You go into a virtual coma during school. But you "don´t understand spanish" so it´s unhelpable!
- You make up words like "unhelpable" because "you don´t speak english" either. hee heeee
- Maybe unhelpable is a word?
- Stop drinking my hair you prostitute´s child balls´ sweller! THE FEMALE PARROT´S VAGINA!
- Salis? Tomas? Tenes novio?
- Deesnay.
- "Oh i thought you were from here" makes your day.
- "You want to put any grade above a 4 on the refrigerator. and speaking of refrigerators, don´t open it with bare feet or expect a "shock" hahah pun!
- You get really really intense pleasure from helping the tourists.
- It´s raining? No school!
- You are tan during the winter! Well, the winter at home.
- You idolize folklore dancers. Okay, they are really cool. have you seen their boots???
- At least once you searched "college internships in argentina" on google (go o glay) to see if there as a full paid job in the summer in buenos aires.
- You give the english teacher particular. But you had to speak like a Good British Chap to be understood.
- Espangles es lo más awesome q hay! Also, conjugaring spanish verbos en English!
- You have a canadien "eh" but you´re not from canada... it´s an Argentine "eh"!
- Streets and towns are named after dates... not weird!
- "Children... this is a real live YANQUI! Ask her a question!!" "yoo liek HI SCHOO???"
- The best nights aren´t in the boliche but under the milky way (it actually exists!) with friends, a campfire, and a guitar.
- Host siblings son mas cariñosos cuando medio-tomados hahaha
- La calle más larga... el rio mas ancho...
- It´s cute when they speak spanish... Even if it´s "fuck youuu!!!" (and it´s cuter if it´s your host mom or if they spell it faqiu!)
- You spend hours talking to viejos bout los militares y la guerra de las malvinas, and it fascinates you in a away your own history never could.
- They know who you are. you don´t remember them, but they know who you are. and they know your horoscopic sign.
- The devil wears makeup: Cristina Kirchner.
- You spent the spring saliendo, the summer at the pool and on the road, and the fall doing all of the things you wanted to do your whole life.
- You listen to Rock Nacional, are involved in the paro (FUERZA CAMPO), and have an argentine flag in your room but you´re still foreign. and you kind of wish you weren´t.